Today I went to see a neurologist. He checked my reflexes and balance and other things. He asked some questions about what has been going on and some other things. And finally he told me that this that is going on, is NOT M.S., is NOT any other muscle disease, and there is NO damage to my central nervous system. He then proceeded to ask me if I had a history or diagnosis of migraines. I told him that since 8th grade I have had migraines and the diagnosis. He told me that the recent onset of problems I'm having are due to migraines without the headache. That this combined with my dysautonomia had caused the onset of these problems. He told me that within time, probably sooner than later, that I would make a 100% recovery from these symptoms. I would regain my speech and walking! I told him that I had never heard of a migraine without a headache. He told me that migraines should really be called a migraine syndrome because they aren't just headaches. He also told me that my Dys. Specialist has me on a good combination of meds for my heart rate and insomnia, but that I might need to up the dosage for my insomnia. He told me to drink a lot of water due to the fact that dysautonomia patients have a low fluid volume. That the excessive water would help to keep the fluids built up and keep my hydrated, therefore helping the dysautonomia. I need to avoid caffeine and only have small amounts if necessary. He also suggested that I begin aerobic excercise like brisk walking. Starting with 5 minutes every day for a week, and each week add 2 minutes. This would build cardiovascular muscle tone, therefore helping the dysautonomia. For my voice I am to practice speaking and singing as much as possible. I learned today that speaking and singing are controlled by different sides of the brain. So in order to rehabilitate my speech, it requires both. He told me that the most important thing to try and keep anything like this from happening again is to simply get my dysautonomia under control and managed.
So today has been a wonderful day! Full of good news! I'm so thankful for all those who have helped during this time. Without friends and family I could never have seen my dysautonomia specialist, who scheduled the visit with a neurologist with an understanding of neuro and dysautonomia. God has worked out each and every fragment of the last 5 weeks. I still have to rehabilitate and I have a lot of work ahead of me, but yet again with God's amazing grace and strength a full recovery of normal speech and walking is in reach. Then all that will be left is managing my dysautonomia! I know there is no cure for my dysautonomia, unless God chooses to do so, but after diagnosis of it, I've learned that I've had this for my entire life. I know that this means that I can live with dysautonomia, and now that I know what it is, I can manage it for a more liveable life! Of course if God chooses to see fit to heal me of it, then all the more better!
This entire journey of trying to find the cause of my problems has caused me to learn what it means to fully rely upon the Lord. For the first time in my life I've truly been at a place where I knew I had a problem and no one could tell me what was wrong. For the first time in my life, I had to depend on someone for help with everything for more than one day. For the first time I couldn't even depend on myself to take care of myself! For the first time in my life, I was truly reliant upon God! I have learned a lot about standing on the promises of God. I've learned a lot about trusting in a never-failing savior. I've learned a lot about myself. I feel like I know more than ever without a doubt that I am loved, cared for, and wanted. By my God, my friends, my family. God's never ending love has reached me from family, friends, and even complete strangers. Each step of the way I have been shown God's love, and that he has never forgotten me, and that he has never failed me. This whole experience has been a struggle physically, yet a victory due to the spiritual growth I gained. Through my weakness I found a strength I never thought I had, even though I've had it all along. I found my strength in my Savior! He was there all along, I just had to reach a weak point, so that there was nothing left of myself so I could see God's strength! It's funny how when we finally lose ourselves, we find God! When we finally get past the point of "I can take care of me" or when there is a point that we can't take care of ourselves, and we move that strong headed flesh aside, that we see God taking care of us. We can finally see clearly.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've learned that when I try and take care of it, things fail. Once I let God take care of it, all doors became open, all pathways became clear, and I was guided step by step to the right path. I became dependent on God and I never lacked anything! God has provided financially as well as medically. There hasn't been a moment when God has not intervened and made things possible. He is my everything. My God has been all I need and then some!